Friday, September 23, 2011

Write on Wednesdays: The Crazies - No, Not The Movie

Write On Wednesdays

This week's prompt is (a little late) about people-watching, and telling the story of a stranger, like another customer in the supermarket, or a neighbor. See the full prompt here at inkpaperpen.

I chose neighbor, because they are completely insane. They must have something wrong with them to act the way that they do. I cannot create a conflict for them simply because I cannot begin to fathom what actually rattles around in those hollow skulls. Here is just a snippet of their cuckoo antics...

Oh, and side note: I wanted to get some pictures, but my camera battery is dead and it's currently raining.

We live in a court; an odd-shaped, half cul-de-sac, and our house is the last one on the block. The Crazies, "Aaron" and "Amy" live right next door. Our driveway is long and winding, and their driveway is one of the half-circle types, which just happens to connect to the bottom of ours.

(Imagine a driveway picture!)

Right adjacent to the driveways is a telephone pole, complete with the usual wires. (Imagine a telephone pole picture!) One day a few months ago, A and A decided they needed some work done on their "Private Property." Yes, they think that because they own the house that they live on "Private Property," complete with at least two signs claiming so -- one so passive-aggressively pointing directly at our house, where it is only visible by us as we leave the driveway. (Imagine a "Private Property" sign picture!) Unbeknownst to us, whatever they decided to do included messing with the wires, as our cable was almost entirely cut out, with only a few channels continuing to work properly.

Of course, this resulted in a phone call from us to the cable company, asking them to come out and inspect our lines, as at this point we were unaware of the cause. Some guys drove out, and apparently this is where all hell broke loose for the Crazies.

The workers were simply doing their jobs and performing their normal job duties, but A and A seemed to think the opposite. The guys were up on the pole, checking things out, when one A (or both As, I don't even remember at this point) barreled out of the house, yelling at the workers to get off their property.

"You can't do this! You can't be here! This is private property; you need to leave!"

I'm not kidding. They think the freakin' telephone pole on the street is their property. Not only that, but they are still claiming that they live on private property - which they do not. Even if they did, the poles on the street do not belong to them. Ummm.. HELLO??!

The workers - tons of sympathy for them for dealing with these maniacs - calmly attempted to explain to the Crazies that it was not private property, that they had every right to be there, and that the Crazies did not in fact, own the telephone pole or anything else on the street. The Crazies of course had no intention of buying these ridiculous words as fact, and continued on screaming like banshees. Poor guys. My heart goes out to them.

My stepfather, Lee, who is 6'1" and nearly 300 pounds of muscle, had no choice but to come outside to diffuse the madness. The Crazies were still yelling, but Lee eventually coaxed (or possibly forced, who knows) them back inside and apologized to the innocent workers.

This is just a small chapter in the novel of dealing with the Crazies. Many other stories exist. Hmm, I should write a book.

Monday, September 19, 2011

The Perfect-ness of Imperfection

Two days ago, on Saturday, my lovely Daniel had a surprise up his sleeve and took me out for the night.

However, the poor boy, bless his heart, cannot hide anything. Ever. He either slips somehow, or when asked a question remotely related, he will smile and simply cannot lie or hide it.

For example, we were at a local elementary school, practicing for softball on Saturday, and when we were finishing up I casually asked him, "So what are we doing tonight?" After a couple of roundabout odd answers, he blurted out that he was planning on surprising me and taking me out, but hadn't thought of what to do yet, and was going to ask me what I wanted. I of course promptly explained to the silly man that if he is going to surprise his amazing and wonderful girlfriend, he is not supposed to ask her opinion on what to do or where to go; he is simply supposed to plan it himself and just do it. I then informed him that I will not be involved in the deicision-making. It was quite the learning experience.

After showering, I arrived at his house only to be whisked away into his silver Nissan Altima and driven to an undisclosed restaurant. I knew we were eating because we were both starving. He actually did trick me when he told me that he missed a turn that led to one of my favorite restaurants, Carrabba's Italian Grill. Once we approached the area of the real dining location, I knew what it was, and I became quite excited. J&R's Steakhouse! Yes! I'd never been, and now, finally, I would taste their juicy, marinated steaks of deliciousness. And that I did. And I added a tasty Kahlua Mudslide to my menu of deliciousness. And that it was.

Upon leaving the restaurant and driving in the direction toward home, Danny made a random right turn off the highway. When I asked where we were going, he only grinned at me and wouldn't say. After pulling into the movie theater parking lot, I asked if we were seeing a movie, and he quickly replied, "Yep!" I should have known something was up, but he actually tricked me again, because as we walked up to the theater, he pulled me to the left toward the strip of stores in the next parking lot. I voiced that I didn't even know what was on that side as I never go there, and he was very good with not slipping and ruining his surprise. Unfortunately, however, he was saddened and his surprise was thwarted as he realized that this place of business no longer existed at this location. As I am quite addicted to ice cream, he confessed his plans to take me to ColdStone because he knew I loved it. I told him not to worry, as it is the thought that counts, and a very nice thought it was.

Though his second plan failed, and he was upset because Google Maps lied to him and told him it still existed, it was still a nice night. We had a good dinner, great conversation, amazing Mudslides, and following the small ice cream mishap, we went to Borders' closing sale to see if there was anything left on their last day of business (so sad).

While some people must have every date planned perfectly and itinerized (yes, I just made that up) to the last minute, I don't need that.  I am grateful to have someone with whom I can still have fun, even with bumps in the road, or, in this case, missing ice cream shops. I'd rather have a haphazardly effective but enjoyable date rather than a perfectly planned but boring rendezvous. And had Danny organized and orchestrated a flawless, romantic night out on the town that was smooth and went off without a hitch, so be it. I'd take either one, because of the person I'm spending it with, not because of the activities. I'm happy just to be with him, enjoying his company and our time together. I wouldn't have it any other way.

Friday, September 16, 2011

Five Question Friday: Post 2

1. If you had a weekly newspaper column, what would you name it?

I'm probably the worst person ever to ask this question to... I really have a lack of creativity and this is probably the worst aspect of it. Do you have any idea how long it took just to come up with "Signing Life" for this blog?

2. Who is your mentor/inspiration?
I wrote about this in another post. The short version... my mom, my boyfriend, and my good friend Debbie all inspire me. One I will add this time is my high school ASL teacher, who was also my first cooperating teacher when I student taught my first ASL classes. To this day, she is still the best teacher I have ever had, and I mold my teaching style after hers. She loves what she does, and her passion for ASL and teaching is what made me want to become a teacher, too. To read about the other three, click here.

3. What is your wake up beverage of choice?
SHAKEOLOGY!! Of course.

4. Would you wear your mom's clothes?

I would wear some of her clothes. Others... hell no.

5. When you were a kid, did you put posters on your wall? If so, what were they of?

Hell yeah! Mostly of the Backstreet Boys, Mandy Moore, and other singers I liked. And a bunch more who I thought were hot, who I don't even remember anymore. Though, I'm not a kid anymore (except at heart), and I have a poster of the movie "See What I'm Saying: The Deaf Entertainers Documentary," signed by all four cast members hanging next to my window. On the other side, next to me bed, I also still have a gigantic poster of Linkin Park that I "borrowed" from Madison Square Garden after their concert a few years ago and never returned... 

Thursday, September 15, 2011

Ten Reasons I Love My Job

The title is self-explanatory. I will list ten reasons why I love what I do.

1) This isn't a job. I run my own business. That means no boss to answer to, no stupid corporate rules, no rude, inconsiderate, dirty customers to deal with and clean up after. I am my own boss.
2) My team is absolutely amazing. I am part of one of the fastest growing teams in the company, and it only continues to grow every day. Not only that, but the support from these people is incredible. We are all there for each other every minute of every day, and I couldn't ask for a better group of people to be involved with in this business.
3) I get to help others. I've always felt satisfaction when helping my friends and family get through a rough time, or a great time, whatever the situation may be. Now that I get to pass this along to people even beyond my personal circle, and branch out to help tons of other people get physically and financially fit, it is absolutely worth every second to be a catalyst to their personal successes.
4) I get to use the products. Even if I wasn't a coach, I would still be using Beachbody's products because I LOVE them. They've helped me, and I love sharing them with others to help them reach their goals as well. Plus, I get a nice coaching discount.
5) I can work on my own time. No specific time schedule to follow. No time clocks. No covering shifts. No requesting vacation and days off and being disappointed. I get whatever time off I want, whatever vacation requests and days off I want, and I work when and for however long I want. Which actually turns out to be a better part of my day, just because I love this and am so passionate about it. Don't get me wrong, I love teaching, too. But this is an added bonus.
6) The potential for a six-figure income. This is not a get-rich-quick scheme. This is a legitimate business that I operate. The more I work at it and nurture it, the more it will grow, the more successful it will become, and the more I can earn.
7) Helping others helps me stay accountable. Coaching my customers reminds me to stick to my health plan and my workouts every day, even if I don't feel like it. We can always find reasons to not work out. Keeping my goals in mind makes me continue to push play, and I always feel better when I'm finished. I've never regretted working out. I've only regretted NOT working out.
8) Giveaways and free stuff. Beachbody is continually rewarding its coaches and customers for their hard work and efforts. I received a free "Insanity: I Earned It" T-shirt for my journey and transformation with Insanity. Webinars occur every week, and sometimes they have giveaways for products like Shakeology. Logging your workouts into Team Beachbody's WOWY Supergym online gives you the chance to earn $500 or $1,000 every single day. And becoming an Emerald coach qualifies you for free customers given to you by Beachbody.
9) Working with people from all over the country. And soon, all over the world. Being an online fitness coach allows me to work with people across the nation, not just here in New York. And Beachbody has plans to launch internationally by the end of this year, which will only increase our connections, growth, and revenues.
10) Beachbody rewards its coaches for their hard work. The more we work and continually reach our goals, Beachbody rewards us with tons of bonuses, including free cash and vacations. What other company does all of this for its coaches and customers? None.

We are always looking for people to join our team. If this sounds like something you'd be interested in, please don't hesitate to contact me for more information so we can get started in changing your life.

Friday, September 9, 2011

Five Question Friday

I came across another new fun thing to do, this time on Fridays. And if Freeky Friday wasn't over for the summer, I'd be upset that I'd be overlapping the two. ;-)

So, as you can guess, five questions are posted, and I answer them. Simple as that. Here we go.

1. What ringtone do you have on your cell phone?
"Take Back The Fear" by Hail The Villain. Awesome band!

2. What is your favorite memory from this summer?
I posted about this before in a Freeky Friday post. Read it here.

3. Paper books or ebooks?
Paper books! I love holding a book and turning the pages. I love the feel of them, and the touch and material of each page. Some even have a great book smell. And I don't care about the weight of them like some people do who rave about Kindles and nooks being so light... I like my books just the way they are. =)

4. If you could have one home upgrade what would it be and why?
I don't have my own home, so my upgrade is to actually have a home. That counts, right?

5. When was your first serious boyfriend/girlfriend?
I guess most people define "serious" as long-term, correct? Like, a year or more? I'll go with that. In that case, my first serious boyfriend was my senior year of high school, Kevin. We were together for a year and four months.

How about you?

And The Versatile Blogger Award Goes To!... What? Me?!

The wonderful Lene has nominated lil' ol' me for the Versatile Blogger Award this week, and, aw shucks, I couldn't be more honored. Thank you Lene!
To accept this award, the nominee must do the following things:
1) Thank the person who gave the nomination (check! see above!)
2) List 7 interesting facts about him or herself
3) Pass on the nomination to 15 newly discovered blogs

Here are my seven "interesting" facts about myself (which may actually be boring to other people):
1. I am a Team Beachbody Coach, getting paid to help others get fit and achieve their fitness goals, and I love every minute of it.

2. I literally just made an Insanity Transformation Video after completing the 60-day program, hopefully to inspire others to move and keep pushing play.

3. I know American Sign Language (duh), love using it on a daily basis, and teach ASL privately.

4. I absolutely despise seafood. It sickens me.

5. I've seen every single episode of "Gilmore Girls," and own all seven seasons on DVD (don't judge me). I'm also obsessed with the TV show "Bones."

6. I've recently become infatuated with TOMS shoes. I love their movement, One for One, and their shoes are super comfy!

7. My mom wanted to name me Chloe or Dana, but my dad refused. They finally decided on Kerry because it's Irish (which is what my dad wanted) and it sounds nice (according to Mom). Kerry means "Dark-haired princess."

A bonus fact: It took me about twenty minutes just to think of those things about myself, since my life is so exciting and all.

Now, time to pass the torch. Check out these blogs I love! Do it. My nominees for the Versatile Blogger Award are:

Amanda at Concrete Jane
Daniel at Daniel Meyer Blog
Sarah at Sensibly Sassy
Douglas at Marvinator's Place
Deb Ann and Hannah at Waving With My Deaf Hands
C at Apparently, This is My Life
Jayne at Jayne Watkins
Adam at merry wanderer of the night
Ashley at Perpetually Me
Sarah at that space in between
Sherry at Fit Coach Sherry
Janice at Mommy's Lounge
Amanda at Amanda St. Clair
Leslie at Gleaning Grace
Morgan at Snapshots

Thursday, September 8, 2011

Two Truths and a Lie: Answer

So the other day I decided to play a little game. I gave you three statements about myself; only two of which were true, and one was a lie. You were to guess which one is the lie. It is now time to reveal the answer. The choices were:

1) I've never broken a bone.
2) If I wasn't a teacher, I'd want to go to veterinary school.
3) The first time I shot a gun, I had 100% accuracy.

The lie is... *drum roll*...

If you guessed number ONE... sorry, you're wrong. I have in fact, never broken a bone. You may have been thrown off by my klutziness, but I apparently have strong bones.

If you guessed number THREE... you are also wrong. My first (and so far only) time shooting a gun, I did have 100% accuracy. It was last summer in Kentucky with Danny while we were visiting his family for his cousin's wedding. Granted it was only one handgun, but I hit the plates every time. ;-)

And finally, if you guessed number TWO, you are correct. Only one person got it right. While I do love animals, and I love my dogs dearly, I do not want to learn how to be their doctor. I also could never put someone's pet to sleep or tell them that there is nothing more to be done. Which is the same reason I could never be a doctor for humans, or a police officer, or anyone that has to tell any family member that their loved one is not coming home. I can't bring that kind of pain on someone. And I'm sure as hell not qualified to try and save them, either.

So, if you guessed number two, which only one of you did, Mr. or Ms. or Mrs. "Anonymous," you WIN! And your prize is... well, nothing, because I don't know who the heck you are. 

Hope you enjoyed! Tune in soon for some more!

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Things I Am Currently Sick Of

This prompt comes from Mama Kat's writing prompts. For some reason I can't get the button to work, but you can check out her blog here.

Prompt: List ten things you are currently sick of.

Oh, no problem! I may get hell for some of this, but, oh well!

In no particular order:

1) JERSEY *&%#! SHORE!

2) Smokers complaining about price of cigarettes, having to smoke outside in the cold/rain/snow/heat, not being able to breathe, coughing all the time, smelling like smoke, fingernails/hair/teeth turning yellow and/or brittle, skin turning leathery, and whatever else they complain about DUE TO smoking. Easy solution, people. STOP SMOKING!

3) People thinking they are funny when making Deaf jokes or jokes about ASL. Especially: "Oh, you know sign language? Yeah, I do, too," and promptly give me the finger. Oh, my goodness, you are so hilarious, I've never heard that before in my life... Guess what? You're not cute. You're not funny. You're not original.

4) Inconsiderate, lazy, rude, messy, dirty, disgusting shoppers. Even before I worked in retail, I was NEVER one of these people. I always put things back where I found them, and if I can't remember where it was, I give it to a salesperson rather than leave it in some random place. If I drop something, I pick it up. I hold my trash until I find a garbage can rather than leaving it under a rack of clothes, on top of a rack of clothes, on the floor of the fitting room, on a stool outside the fitting room, in the fitting room rack outside the doors, under a pile of clothes, between stacks of folded shirts, in a pocket of jeans, or inside boxes of merchandise. And yes, that has ALL happened to me while working. Why are people so damn rude and lazy? How freaking difficult is it to just take your merchandise out of the fitting room (YES, BACK ON HANGERS, AND
NOT INSIDE-OUT) when you're done trying it on? What makes people think that the fitting rooms are an effing BATHROOM? Do you see a toilet? A sink? No? Then don't leave your bodily fluids and baby's dirty diapers wherever you damn well please. Why do people walk up to a poor retail slave and demand service like the self-entitled prissy princesses they act to be? Chances are if you are rude to an employee for no good reason, he or she will either a) be rude to you right back; b) ignore you and continue working; or c) simply not give you what you want due to your condescending attitude. Just because a person works in a retail store, that does not make you any better than he or she is. He or she is probably working for a damn good reason, such as to make an income while going to school to do something better with their lives, or feed their family, or help their family because someone else lost their job, became injured or disabled, etc. etc. etc. Get over yourself.

5) Anything done by, worn by, said by, or remotely related to the following people and/or things: Lady Gaga, Miley Cyrus/Hannah Montana, The Jonas Brothers, Justin Bieber, Chris Brown, Selena Gomez, Pretty Little Liars, The Secret Life of the American Teenager, vampire movies/TV shows, Will Ferrell, Rebecca Black, Charlie Sheen, Ke$ha, Lindsay Lohan, Royal Wedding BS, any reality show except Hell's Kitchen, Megan Fox, Nicolas Cage, Michael Vick...

6) People doing stupid, reckless things to get attention, and bragging about it. Things such as: Getting into a fight with someone, sleeping with a million people, smoking (anything), drinking themselves into oblivion, doing any illegal drug, getting into trouble with law enforcement, driving recklessly, etc. I'm not impressed. You sound like a moron. You're not cool. Let's see how cool you think you are when driving recklessly at 732894mph causes you to crash into a tree, hit and kill someone, or kill an entire family in one car all because you thought you were a hotshot. Let's see how cool you think you are when sleeping with every person you possibly can gets you one or more incurable STDs or an unwanted pregnancy. Let's see how cool you think you are when run-ins with the police land you in prison because you wanted to boast about your "world against authority" attitude. Let's see how cool you think you are when you are fighting for your life in the hospital due to severe alcohol poisoning simply because you had to prove to everyone at the party how cool and edgy you were for drinking 47 shots of tequila in a row. Yeah, real awesome of you.

7) PLANKING. And whatever other stupid words are now associated with this moronic act.

8) Ridiculous spelling and grammar mistakes. Your = possessive. You're = You are. It's not that difficult.

9) Ridiculous and absurd baby names. Kal-El, Pilot Inspektor, Apple, Blanket, Coco, Kyd, Suri, Sage Moonblood, Maddox, Memphis Eve, Ocean, Rocket Valentino, Racer Maximilliano, Rebel Antonio, Rogue Jaoquin, Rhiannan Elizabeth, Blue Angel, Audio Science, Moon Unit, Diva Thin Muffin, Moxie Crimefighter, Tu Morrow, Jermajesty, Bronx Mowgli (yes, from the damn Jungle Book), Reignbeau, Freedom, Zuma Nesta Rock, Romeo, Brooklyn, Cruz, Seven Sirius, Puma Rose Sabti, Mars Merkaba, Poppy Honey Rosie, Daisy Boo Pamela, Petal Blossom Rainbow, Atlas, Bandit Lee, Denim Cole, Diezel Ky, Nakoa-Wolf Manakauapo Namakaeha Momoa (no, I didn't make that up. How could I?!), Bluebell Madonna, Calico, Dashiell, Sonora Rose, Magnus, Mattias, Banjo, Speck Wildhorse, Bamboo, Indio Falconer, Elijah Bob Patricius Guggi Q, and dear GOD the list goes on forever! WTF were they thinking?! I can't decide which one is the most idiotic.

10) Pe0plE Wh0 WriTe L1k3 Th1s. And "Dis." And who use no punctuation whatsoever so their paragraph is one gigantic long sentence and keeps running on and on forever and you can't tell where one thought ends and one begins because it's all jumbledtogetherinonebiggiantmessofwords.

Sadly, I could only limit this to ten. What about you? What are some things that you are sick of?

Write on Wednesdays: One Liner

Write On Wednesdays

This is my third week with Write on Wednesdays. Today is about a great one liner that describes a part of my day. Click the button above to read the full prompt. Here is my line:

And as we lay together, listening to the rhythmic drumming of his heart, fingers laced and legs intertwined, I knew I had found my treasure.

Hop on over to InkPaperPen at the button above to read others' posts for this week!

Monday, September 5, 2011

Two Truths and a Lie

I played this game with my ASL students as a student teacher, and thought it might be fun to play it here with whoever actually reads this thing. You may have heard of it or played before. The game is called Two Truths and a Lie. The way it works is that I tell you three things about myself; two of them are true, and one is a downright lie. Then you, the reader, leave a comment with your guess as to which one is the lie. After a few undetermined amount of guesses, I will post the answer. So, let's get to it! I'll keep it simple for the first game.

1) I've never broken a bone.
2) If I wasn't a teacher, I'd want to go to veterinary school.
3) The first time I shot a gun, I had 100% accuracy.

So, which one is the lie? Leave a comment with your guess!

Feel free to play this game as well; just please credit it back to my blog. :-)

Saturday, September 3, 2011


Writing prompt from Mama Kat's.

I found another fun little writing prompt exercise through InkPaperPen. Click the link above to check it out. Today: "Tell us about that scar."

Oh, so many to choose from.

As I have stated before, I am a klutz. This has therefore resulted in many, many scars across my body. Today, I will tell you about the two times my klutziness has resulted in stitches: once in my face, and once in my finger.

The first occurred when I was about eight years old. At that time, my mother, older brother, and I lived in a tiny apartment in my grandmother's house with a small kitchen, a smaller living room, and an even smaller bathroom. A minuscule bedroom was built for my brother and I to share, while my mom used the living room as hers. 

One afternoon, my brother and I decided to play catch in the backyard. Things were going fine, the natural back-and-forth progression that involves a simple game of catch. Suddenly, my brother threw the ball quite a bit further than I could reach, so I ran for it. This, consequently, made me look up at the hurdling ball in the sky rather than where my feet were landing. My grandmother had apparently just cut down a tree, because that's when I tripped over a stump and landed face-first in a giant pile of sticks, cutting and puncturing my face and neck. With blood streaming down my face and neck, staining my shirt, I screamed and cried, and cried and screamed. Mom snatched a towel to hold to my crimson wounds, most worried about my neck, and we were off to the hospital. The end result? Two stitches in my chin, leaving no visible scar, and bandaids for the rest of the cuts.

The second sewing incident to my body happened my senior year of high school, during second period art class. I can't describe the project very well, but we were required to draw a self-portrait, and cut it out onto linoleum using a tool something like an Exact-o Knife. My first attempt at cutting, I held the project at the top, and slowly but firmly slid the knife across the board. Of course, immediately after, I slipped, and sliced my left index finger open, which instantaneously gushed blood onto the table and my project. I ran to the counter next to my table for paper towels, dripping blood on the floor on the way there. Pressing the towels to my finger did nothing to stop it, and so I asked a friend to tell our teacher that I was running to the nurse.

At the nurse's office, she did her best to patch up the wound, but it wouldn't stop bleeding and suggested I go to the hospital to get stitches. Despite my protesting, she called my mom at home, who of course didn't answer. She called the next two people on my emergency contact list, who of course didn't answer either. Finally the last person on the list, my stepfather's mother, answered and came to pick me up. She drove me home, and it turns out my mom didn't answer simply because she was outside with the dogs and didn't hear the phone ring. 

We drove to the hospital, as regular doctor's offices don't handle stitches. The doctor numbed my finger, sewed up two or three stitches, wrapped up my finger, and we were done. Most kids would have been happy to get out of school for a day, but I was pissed that I had to miss the entire rest of my day due to a stupid cut on my finger. I couldn't just slap a bandaid on it and be done with it?! Jeez.

How did you get some of your scars?

Search This Blog